Remembrance
by Wakkowarnerlover
Summary: Perry is very happy to be able to finally communicate with the boys, but when Dennis the rabbit starts causing trouble again, Perry is unable to keep the boys uninvolved. (T for slight violence- was unsure if it would be acceptable for younger than 13)
1. Chapter 1

So this was what it felt like when you were being asphyxiated.

Perry hadn't actually been trained for fighting swamp vipers, but he felt he was doing pretty good. He'd filled his lungs with oxygen and tried to make himself take up more space than he needed.

The snake wasn't very pleased. He hadn't expected his prey to be so hard to squeeze to death.

"Food." He hissed.

"Living organism. Trying to survive here." Perry responded.

"No. You are food."

"I'm not sure we're gonna agree anytime soon."

The snake lunged for his face. Perry pushed its neck away.

His arms and his legs were free, but his middle wasn't. And yet the snake was winning. It was a slow process, but Perry knew it was winning.

Desperately he looked for a way out. He was surrounded by trees, but he couldn't just get up and go get a branch to whack the snake on the head with.

How did platypuses even survive in the wild?

"Death." The snake said. "You smell like death."

Perry found it much harder to breathe now. He started gasping for air, even though he knew it wouldn't be of any help.

He started thinking about a nature show Phineas and Ferb had been watching the day before. It was talking about how every single animal had a way to escape from a potentially dangerous situation, whether they were aware of it or not.

Perry kicked the snake in the tail with his hind leg. Something seemed to hook into the snake.

Perry had an extra claw he hadn't known about.

The snake looked surprised for a moment. Then he let out a terrible screech.

"VENOM!" He hissed. "STINGING BURNING VENOM!" He unraveled himself from Perry.

Perry hoisted himself up. The snake bit his leg, but he pulled himself away and ran as fast as he could.

"VENOOOMMMMM!" The snake's call became fainter.

Perry was out of the woodlands and back in his neighborhood. No way was he ever parachuting down in Danville Forest again.

He crawled in through his pet door.

"Hey, Perry." Phineas said. He was sitting at the kitchen table, looking at some blueprints with his stepbrother, Ferb.

"Hey." Perry jumped onto the stool next to his owner.

Phineas gave him a concerned look. "What's with your leg?"

"Yeah, I found out I had a poison claw today. Got in a tiff with a snake. You should have seen me! I nailed him. Literally. With the claw."

"Looks like he bit you."

Perry looked down at his leg. It was swollen. He hadn't noticed the burning pain until now.

"Does it hurt?" Phineas asked. "Should we call a vet?"

"No." Perry lied. "It'll probably get better in a few hours. I've been bit before."

"It looks kind of bad."

"Snakes, snaggletoothed badgers and man are the main enemies of the platypuses. Or platypi. Or platypeople." Ferb said.

"I know what you mean." Phineas said.

Perry climbed down from the chair and started toward the fridge. He fell down in a sudden spell of dizziness.

"Perry, are you SURE you're okay?" Phineas said nervously.

"Don't… worry. I'm good." Perry pushed himself back up and limped to the fridge. He opened it and pulled out a banana.

"Okay." Phineas said doubtfully. He turned back to his blueprints.

"I hope it wasn't a viper snake." Ferb said. "Vipers have a special kind of venom that can be fatal to their victims."

"You're chatty today." Phineas said.

"Yes, yes I am."  
Perry sat down on the floor and peeled the banana, trying to ignore the searing pain in his leg. He didn't want the boys to fear for him.

Ferb handed Phineas a letter that had been on the mail pile on the table.

Phineas tore it open and read it. "OH MY GOSH! I won the local science fair! We won fifteen dollars!"

Ferb pumped his fist in a silent cheer.

"YAY!" Phineas jumped around the table.

"I knew you'd win." Perry smiled.

And fell in a faint on the floor.

* * *

Perry revived in his pet bed. Automatically, he turned and looked at his leg.

It had a bandage around it. It still hurt a little.

"You're awake." Phineas was petting him.

"What happened…"

"After you passed out, we called your vet. You know, Monogram. He came by and-"

"He doesn't know, does he?" Perry asked.

"No, of course not. Think we were going to tell him or something? No. All we told him was we noticed you had a bite on your leg after you fainted and we thought it was a snakebite. So he treated you for it and stuff."

"You're angry."

Phineas huffed. "Yeah, I'm angry. You should have let me call someone the instant you got home. You could have died. He almost didn't get to you in time."

"I didn't want you to worry."

"I'd have worried less if I'd gotten you help right away, and didn't have to listen to about a million He-may-not-make-its."

"I'm sorry." Perry tried to get up.

Phineas pushed him back down. "You're not supposed to get up for twenty-four hours. And you can't eat or drink for that amount of time, either."

Perry frowned. "You shouldn't have told me that. Now I'm hungry and thirsty."  
Phineas smiled a little.

"Could you do something for me?" Perry asked.

"You need me to get you something?" Phineas stood up. "There's a coloring book downstairs if you're bored."  
"Can you call a vet? Not Monogram, a real vet… just tell them that you found a snake in Danville Forest, and he might need help."

"What? Perry, that snake doesn't deserve help. Not after he almost killed you!"

"Phinny, he was just trying to get a meal. And I did poison him first."

Phineas shook his head.

"Phineas, he shouldn't have to suffer. Get him help."

Phineas sighed. "...Okay. You're right."

Monogram came into the room.

Perry froze. Had he heard Phineas talking?

"I need to run a few more tests." Monogram said, holding up his vet bag. "Could you go downstairs, please?"

"I was just leaving." Phineas went around Monogram and left the room.

Monogram closed the door. Then he sat down next to Perry.

"You're lucky to be alive." He said.

Perry nodded.

"There's no need to worry about work." Monogram continued. "Agent R will take over for you. He's Ralph's son, you know, Rocky. And your blood pressure is back to normal, so you'll be fine. You'll recover quickly."

Great. Crazy Rocky was taking over for him. Perry felt better already.

Not.

"I hope your leg stops hurting soon." Monogram said. He stood up and left the room.

Phineas came in a few minutes later. "The vet found the snake and is treating him. She says he'll be okay."

"Good." Perry said. He curled up in his bed. "I hate this."

"I do too." Phineas said. "You shouldn't have to go through this. Hey, you want me to turn the TV on?"

"What TV?"

"The high-definition one Ferb and I built." Phineas pressed a button, and a television slid down on the wall.

"Okay. Yeah, that'd be nice."

Phineas turned the TV on.

"And now, the show you have all been waiting for, the Carlos the caring clown show! That's right, kids! The world's most popular toy now has his own SHOW! Caring and sharing!"

Perry moaned.

Phineas changed the channel.

"Next on the Uncovery Channel, the wonderful world of worms!"

"That's gonna make me hungry." Perry said. "But it'll do."

"Okay. Call me if you need anything."

"Will you be able to hear me from downstairs?"

"I meant call me. You have my number."

"Right. I will."

"Okay." Phineas handed him the remote and went back downstairs.

"Worms dig around in the dirt all day." Said the TV. "They recycle nutrients."

"Good for them." Perry said. He wrapped his blanket tightly around himself.

"Some worms can't move on their own. They depend on their environment to move them around. Some worms live in water."

"Knew that already." Perry closed his eyes and fell asleep to the lulling sound of worm facts.


	2. Chapter 2

"I'm bored."

"We thought you might be." Phineas said. "We brought you some of your old squeaky toys. You still like those, right?"

Perry picked up a plastic hamburger and squeezed it half-heartedly. "Yeah, I still do. I'm not exactly in the mood for squeaky noises, though. You know who's taking over for me while I'm immobile? Rocky. This crazed raccoon."

"He'll do fine." Phineas reassured his pet.

"Look at this. Look at the text he just sent me." Perry pulled out his videophone. "Yo dude, I just fought Doofenshmirtz and it was like, totally rad. He had this inator-thing and I was all like BAM and he was like NO and I was like YEAH and then I like won and was all like VICTORY and man you should have seen me, I was like EPIC RACCOON or something. G2G." Perry deleted the message. "That is the only intelligence level he has, you two. Talking like some weird skateboarder."

"Far out." Ferb said.

Phineas and Perry looked at him.

"Just kidding." Ferb said.

"He's not taking his job seriously." Perry muttered.

"Is he new?" Phineas asked.

"Yeah, but…"

"Maybe all new guys act like that."

"I didn't."

"You're different, buddy. But believe me, all new people, no matter how they act, are a different kind of annoying to people. When I first moved here, Buford didn't like me."

"No way." Perry said.

"He thought I was really annoying. And I thought Baljeet was annoying. But now we're all friends."  
"It's true!" Irving called from outside the bedroom window. "I saw it happen!"

Phineas closed the shades. "Irving… well… he hasn't exactly gone past the annoying yet."

"Rocky equals Irving."  
Phineas shrugged. "You'll get used to it. I hardly notice Irving's there anymore. How does your leg feel?"

"Stiff. Can we watch something?"

"Sure." Phineas turned the TV on.

"This is the new bagalicious bag!" An announcer on the TV said. "It's portable, and can hold up to three items! It also fits into any larger bag."

"Any larger bag? ANYTHING fits into any larger bag!" Perry said. "Here's a giant mammoth, it has tusks, wooly fur, and fits into ANY LARGER BAG. However, it won't fit into any SMALLER bag."

Phineas started petting him on his favorite spot on his back. Perry felt calmer.

"When my leg gets better, I'm taking you to Disney." Perry said.

"To reward me for petting you?"

"Just thought it'd be fun."

* * *

"Where are we going?"

"To a café. It'll be good."

As soon as the walk light turned on, Perry dragged Palmer and Pamela across the street.

Palmer prodded a few people that were crossing in front of them with his closed umbrella.

"Palmer, cut that out!" Perry hissed.

"They're going too slow."

Perry hoisted Palmer up by the scruff of his neck. "Keep up, Pam."

He put Palmer down in a chair when they were inside the café. Pamela sat down next to him.

Perry sighed and plunked down into a booth across from his platypups. He'd only been watching them for ten minutes, and already he was exhausted. "How have you been?"

"I've been good." Palmer said. "Since I last saw you, I mean. I play around with my friend King a lot. Last week we tied the back of a car to a traffic light and it drove off and the traffic light stopped it from going. It was so funny."

"We're moving to a bigger house." Pamela said.

"And then I painted a picture of a cow on this guy's pants when he was talking to someone."

"Wait. Slow down. You're moving?" Perry asked.

"Yeah. Mommy bought the house that is with the garage. Now it's ours. She said I'm not allowed to draw on the walls of the big house, though."  
"But you're still keeping the garage?"

"Yep." Palmer picked up a menu that was sitting on the table. "What should I get?"  
"Want hot chocolate?" Perry asked.

"I'm hungry." Pamela said. "I want bread and butter."

"Me too." Said Palmer. "And hot chocolate."

"Me too." Pamela said.

Perry scribbled their orders down on a napkin and handed it to a waiter. The waiter came back a few minutes later with hot chocolate.

"He gives you sugar with it, but believe me, it's sweet enough." Perry warned them.

Pamela opened the sugar packets and poured them into her drink.

Perry shook his head. He spooned a bit of hot chocolate into his mouth.

Palmer poured some of his cup into the purse of a woman passing by. "When do we get to see you again?"

"I don't know. I'm going to have my hands full for the next few months."  
"I have a friend named Kiki." Pamela said. "Her parents live in the same house."  
"Are her parents part of an elite force of animal agents? I'm sorry, guys. I have more stuff to take care of now. I'll visit when I can."

"I train at the O.W.C.A." Palmer said. "But I still have time to do stuff."

"You don't have a host family." Perry's videophone buzzed. He reached into his fur pocket and pulled it out.

A dark shape was visible on the screen. "Woah, I thought I was beating you." It was Devon the dog's voice.

Carrie the cat's voice was less audible. "No. I always win at Go Fish."

"Dang. Um… do you have any threes?"  
"Go Fish."  
"Dev?" Perry said.

"Gosh, I thought I just heard Perry. Is he under my chair?"

"Dev, I think you sat on your phone and butt-dialed me again." Perry said.

Palmer started to laugh. He came over and looked at the screen.

"What?" The image changed as Devon pulled the phone out from underneath him. "Oh. Sorry Perry. Is that Pal in the background?"

"Yep!" Palmer said.

"Hello, Pal! You're getting big."

Palmer beamed.

"Well, see you later." Devon hung up.

"Hey, if I get more brothers, can we name them Payton and Berry?" Pamela asked.

"You aren't getting more brothers." Perry said.

"Pam, that's going to make us all sound like desserts." Palmer said.

"No, it won't."

"Yep. PayPal-BerryPam. Sounds like an expensive dessert. And maybe we can name one Chocolate Mousse!"

"Change of subject." Perry said.

"Okay. Yesterday Pam and I watched the Carlos the caring clown show…"

* * *

Perry was completely worn out by the time he got back home. He slunk over to the couch, jumped up, and lay down in Ferb's lap.

Phineas and Ferb were watching a movie with Candace.

Perry fell asleep almost instantly.

_He was in a wooden building. A big inflatable heart was sitting in a corner._

_It was singing about a tree._

_Perry tried to pick it up, but it was heavy._

_"You'll have trouble carrying that down the stairs." A voice said. Dennis the rabbit appeared from the shadows, holding a candle in his paw. "But if you love it enough, anything is possible… I suppose."_

_"Why do I need to carry it downstairs?"_

_"It can't walk in its condition."_

_"It can stay up here."_

_Dennis dropped the candle. The floor caught fire._

_"I suppose that is an option." He smiled evilly, and then leapt down the stairs._

Perry woke with a start, his heart pounding furiously. Ferb was stroking him.

He had a feeling that dream wasn't one of his confusing, useless dreams.

It was one of those dreams that showed him a bit of his future.

* * *

"I like taking planes."

"Good for you. I hate them." Perry picked up a magazine that had been in the seatback pocket.

"At least we'll get to Disney faster." Phineas said.

"Look at this. Apparently you're supposed to order something from this and you can get it on the plane. And they're selling tasers. You're not even allowed to BRING a taser on a plane. I tried once."

"Maybe they mail it to your home." Ferb said.

"Look at the ad for it. It shows a bunch of people holding hands and smiling. Buy a taser today! Have fun paralyzing people to no end!"

"I have to go to the bathroom." Phineas said.

"Seatbelt light's on. You'll have to wait." Perry licked his finger and turned the page. "Or, you could just buy this portable toilet seat. Five ninety-nine."

"You know what sounds really good right now?" Ferb asked. "Lemonade."

Phineas glared at him.

"Cool, refreshing, watery, liquidy lemonade." Ferb sang.

Phineas growled.

The seatbelt light turned off.

"Finally. I'll be right back." Phineas unbuckled his seatbelt and got up.

The seatbelt light turned back on. "Ah, this is your captain speaking. We've run into some sudden turbulence. Please remain seated."  
Phineas sat back down.

"Automatic hair remover. Nah, we have adhesive bandages at home. Just tell Pinky to get the darn thing off of your arm. Oh, cool! A water dish shaped like Vance Ward!"

The seatbelt light was off. Phineas stood up again.

It turned back on. "This is your captain speaking. Sorry, I accidentally turned the light off. You have to stay seated."

"OH, COME ON." Phineas slammed his head against the seat in front of him.

"What's this?" Perry demanded. "Pizza-free yogurt? ALL yogurt is pizza-free! That's like an advertisement for walnut-free milk!"

"Ooh, can we get that fountain?" Ferb asked, pointing at a picture on the magazine.

"Why? It's a fountain that shoots out thirty jets of water at once. Not exactly a work of art."

Phineas gave them a murderous stare.

"Sorry." Ferb and Perry said in unison.

The seatbelt light turned off again. Phineas waited a moment, and then got up.

The man sitting in front of Ferb leaned his seat back as far as it would go and promptly fell asleep, snoring loudly.

Ferb didn't look comfortable.

"For five dollars, I'll touch his nose with my pinky." Perry offered.

Ferb shook his head. He yanked his arm free from underneath the man's seat.

Perry poked the man in the shoulder. "Hey, buddy. It's only a forty-minute flight. I know! Let's see how many gumdrops we can fit in his mouth."

By the time Phineas returned, Perry and Ferb had squeezed twenty-three gumdrops into the sleeping man's mouth.

"How many more will fit, d'ya think?" Perry asked.

Ferb squeezed a pink gumdrop in between a yellow and green one. "I think we have almost reached the limit."

"Guys, you'll wake him up!" Phineas warned.

"That's what we're aiming for." Perry tried to fit another gumdrop in and failed. "Dang. He's full. Should we try his nose?"  
"Ladies and gentlemen, this plane will be landing soon. Please put your seats back into the upright position…"  
The man woke up and adjusted his seat. Ferb was free.

They heard a coughing sound. "Whaht in da nahme…" A spitting noise. "How did all of those things get in my mouth?!"


	3. Chapter 3

"No. Phineas, I am not going."

"Come on! It won't be any fun without you. Besides, you told me once that nothing scares you. So if nothing scares you, you don't have anything to worry about."  
"Oh, so it's suddenly a scary ride now? You've been trying to convince me for the last ten minutes that it wasn't scary."

"It's NOT. Okay, look." Phineas took out the map of Disney and pointed at it. "We just went on Splash Mountain, right? You like Splash Mountain."

"Wow, I had no idea."  
"This ride is basically the same thing. It doesn't even have a drop or anything sudden. It just has a bunch of animatronics. Just like the animatronics in Splash Mountain. Please, Perry? You'll like it."

Perry sighed.

"Well, we're going on it. So you can either wait for us at the entrance or come along."

"What sort of choice is that? It's not like I can leave you unsupervised." Perry mumbled. He followed his owners through the gate of the Haunted Mansion.

There were a lot of ramps and stairs. The path to the mansion was innocently decorated with plants and flowers.

"Come baaaaack." Ferb said in a girly voice. "Come baaaaccckkkk!"

"We went on this last time we came." Phineas told Perry. "It was awesome."

"And the reason we're going on it again is because some creepy animatronic lady told you to come back?"

"Yes." Said Ferb.

Phineas nudged Ferb with his arm. "Nooo, we're coming back because it's awesome. And it's NOT scary, I promise."

They finally reached the door of the mansion. Phineas tried to open it.

"Is this the scary part?" Perry asked. "The door doesn't open, so now we're trapped OUTSIDE of the mansion?"

"They can't let us in yet." Phineas said. "We have to wait until they're ready for us."

Finally the door opened. A Disney employee led them in. "Enter… if you DARE."

"That's comforting." Perry said.

"It's NOT scary, boy. Come on."

Perry followed them into a big room. A chandelier hung from the ceiling.

The Disney employee waved them into another room. This one was more circular. "For your safety, please move into the center of the room."  
"Are they gonna set the rest of the room on fire or something?" Perry asked.

The door closed. Then the room started to move downward. The wall grew taller.

"No windows and no doors!" Hissed a creepy voice from above. "How will you EVER escape?"

"Doofenshmirtz tried this once." Perry said. "I escaped in five seconds."

"Hush." Phineas said.

"Well, you can always go out MY way!" Said the voice. The ceiling turned blue, and thunder started to crash. "Ah ha! AH HA HA HA! HA HA HA HA HA!"

"I don't get it. What's so funny?" Perry asked.

Ferb shrugged. "Maybe he thinks lightning is funny."

Another door opened in the side of the wall.

"He lied. There WAS a door." Perry said.

They went into a darker room decorated like a mansion. There were chairs going by.

"The chairs are the actual ride part." Phineas said.

"You mean that whole thing with the windows and doors wasn't it?" Perry demanded. "There's MORE?"  
They got into a chair together and pulled down the safety belt. Then it took them into the ride.

"Look, Perry. They use projections and mirrors to make those dancing ghosts down there." Phineas said, pointing at a dining room that was below them.

"Interesting. I like that ghost with the nerdy glasses. Which one's your favorite?"

"I don't know. I can't really see them very clearly from up here."

"Maybe that ghost will lend you his glasses."

The chairs went into another area. A bride sat in front of a mirror, crying hysterically. Her dress was torn, and a skull was visible in the mirror.

It made Perry a little sad. He wasn't sure why, though.

"She died on her wedding day." Ferb said in an eerie tone.

Phineas glanced at Perry. "What's wrong, boy?"

Perry folded his arms.

They came to a graveyard, passing by a few skeletons hanging on trees. A zombie stood off to the side.

A black dog with glowing red eyes and half of its face missing stood shockingly close to their chair as it passed by. He barked at them, showing pointed teeth.

"It's not scary, Perry." Perry said in a high-pitched voice. "Not half as scary as Splash Mountain."

"They're fake, Perry. Animatronics, remember? Just like the animals in Splash Mountain."

"Brer' Rabbit's bones are on the INSIDE of his body and he doesn't have his brains squishing out." Perry retorted. "Oh great, are we going BACKWARDS now?"  
The chair was slowly going downward.

"We're being buried allliiivveee!" Ferb clapped his hands.

The chair passed by skeletons and zombies, and hands reaching out of coffins.

"Who builds a mansion and puts a GRAVEYARD inside of it?" Perry asked. "I mean, who DOES that?"  
"Now we're in a ghost town." Ferb said.

The chair passed by a few people in old-timey clothing. A mangy dog was standing by its owner. The chair turned so that they were facing a huge zombie with its jaw hanging off. "Ha ha ha ha! AH HA HA HA!"

"He must be related to the 'No doors and windows' dude." Perry covered his eyes. "That's it, tell me when it's over."

"Aw, Perry." Phineas cuddled him. "It wasn't that bad…"

"He's gross." Perry mumbled.

"It's all gone now."

"Are you sure?"

"Yep. The chair's coming to the exit."

The chair stopped. Perry leapt out, closely followed by Phineas and Ferb.

"I'm sorry you didn't like it." Phineas said sadly. "I swear the one we rode on before wasn't scary like that. Thanks for letting us go, though."

"You guys are twisted." Perry said. "Much more twisted than I thought. You actually ENJOYED that?"

"The zombies were a bit much." Ferb said.

There was a window on the wall next to them. A zombie bride with a tattered dress was waving at them. "Come baaacccckkkk!"

"NEVER!" Perry yelled at her.

"We're DYING to see you again!" Ferb said at the same time as the lady. "Come baaacccckkk!"

They left and started walking out of the courtyard.

"That was disgusting." Perry said.

"I'm sorry!" Phineas said again.

"Don't worry about it. I'm glad you two had fun." Perry looked at the Disney map. "Where should we head to next?"

His videophone buzzed. He reached into his pocket and answered it. "Yo. Who's calling?"

"The babysitter has the NERVE to call me in the middle of her job and QUIT, apparently they've destroyed the oven… Get over there, please!"  
"Poppy? Wait, you mean Pal and Pam are alone?"

"I'd assume so, the babysitter quit- just get over there as fast as you can, please, I'm begging you!"

"Er… I'd love to help you out, but I'm kind of at Disney at the moment…"  
"You're closer than I am. I'm in Russia until six!"

"I can call someone to go over there."

"Perry, listen to me. Your son and daughter are at home, doing something with the OVEN. THE OVEN."

"Worst that will happen is the house blows up. I'll call someone, okay?"

"PERRY. You refuse to help me RAISE them, the least you can do is look after them for five hours!"

"Fine, fine. I'm going." Perry hung up and sighed. "Sorry, boys… we'll have to cut this a little short."

"What was that about a house blowing up?" Phineas asked.

"Just a little family drama. I'll drop you two off at home and then go over there…"

"Can we come?" Phineas asked.

* * *

Perry shoved open the door of the house. Smoke was coming from the kitchen.

"PALMER!" He shouted. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

Palmer came running from the kitchen. He was covered in food. "Making PayPal-BerryPam! It's gonna be the best dessert ever!"

"The very best!" Pamela said with a cough. "Except the oven exploded and now the pots are gurgling really loud."

"Aw, are these your babies?" Phineas asked.

"Don't be fooled by the cuteness." Perry shoved past Palmer and entered the kitchen. The smoke was heavy, and one of the pots on the stove was spewing like a geyser. Another one was overflowing. "Guys, what IS this?"

"It's the chocolate and worm filling." Pamela said innocently. "And the actual dessert was in the oven. But it was too big, and that's when the door popped off."

Perry looked at the oven. A big black shape was in it.

He tried to pull it out. It didn't move. "What the heck… did you cook a ROCK?"

"No. That's the cake part." Palmer said. "It was gooshy before it cooked."

Perry kicked the lump, then grabbed his foot in pain.

"The mud pies go on top." Palmer said. He pulled a bit of dirt out of a pail that was in the sink and smoothed it onto the rock cake in the shape of a pony. It stuck beautifully.

"Clean this up NOW." Perry growled.

"But it's not done yet."

A flush was audible from the bathroom.

"NO PAM!" Palmer called. "THAT'S WHERE WE WERE STIRRING THE FROSTING!"

"It is overflowing." Pamela's voice called back.

"Whatever made you stir FROSTING in the TOILET?" Perry snapped.

"The lack of bowls." Palmer said. "And the toilet also had free water in it, so that took care of using any measuring cups."

"At least they tried." Phineas said, covering his mouth to prevent any smoke from entering his lungs.

"Pal, I want to see this kitchen cleaned before your mom gets home." Perry tried to keep his voice level.

Palmer looked hurt. "Did we do something bad?"

"Yes. Very bad. Now clean up."

Palmer's hung his head. "I just wanted to make something nice for mommy." He whimpered. "I didn't mean to break the oven. Or the toilet."

Perry took a deep breath. "Pal. It's fine. I'll help you, okay? But get the mud and the worms and the chocolate cleaned up."

"What about the rock?"

"I think the rock wants to stay there. Maybe you can paint a picture on it or something, make it look prettier."

Palmer's eyes lit up. "I can paint cows!"

After a few hours, the kitchen and the bathroom were back to normal, save for the doorless oven with the giant rock in it. The rock had a lovely picture of a cow eating a banana on it.

Poppy came in just as Pamela licked up the last chocolate drop on the floor. "I see the oven's probably not going to be useable anytime soon." She said.

"That's Perry's female." Ferb said teasingly.

Phineas covered Ferb's mouth.

"You'll be the only one of your friends with a rock in the oven." Perry patted it.

Poppy smiled a little.

"Its name can be King Penguin Epic Rock!" Palmer said.

"I better get them home." Perry said, pointing to Phineas and Ferb. "And next time, please let me call Devon or something."

"Devon doesn't know how to handle them." Poppy said. "Thanks."

"Welcome."

"That was better than any Disney ride!" Phineas said. "The pot was practically blasting off!"

"But we still CAN go back to Disney again and finish our trip, right?" Ferb asked.

Perry nodded. "For sure. Remember, we HAVE to go back. The zombie bride told us to."


	4. Chapter 4

Perry entered his lair and sat down in his seat, staring at the huge screen that sat over the desk. He waited patiently for Monogram to notice him.

"I don't know, Carl." Monogram was saying. "I just think the salad bar's too pricey these days."

"Not half as pricey as the Mexican Food station." Carl responded.

"Yeah, well, that's because tacos are way better than salads. But I couldn't even get lunch yesterday. I used up all my cash on shipments of flea shampoo and brushes. I hate flea season. I keep telling the agents to stay away from each other during flea season so they don't catch anything, but do they listen? NO."

"Why don't you just recruit the fleas instead of getting rid of them?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Carl. We don't have hats small enough for them." Monogram thought a moment. "Hm. But maybe… Oh! Agent P! Sorry, didn't see you there…"

Perry scratched his arm.

"That's not a flea, is it?"

Perry shook his head.

"Okay. Good. All right, your mission: We'll need you to deliver a research piece to the agency's laboratory. It's about an hour away, and it is IMPERATIVE that you don't allow this piece to fall into enemy hands. It's a strange sort of device we found around Danville Forest, and we haven't been able to figure out how it works or what it does. Carl will be coming into your lair momentarily to give you it, along with the directions to the agency's lab."

Carl banged on the door. "Agent P? I think you locked it."  
Perry scowled. He stood up, walked over to the door, and unlocked it.

"Thank you." Carl said. He handed Perry a sheet of paper and a small device that looked like a raygun of some sort.

Perry stared at it. He felt like he was supposed to know what it did.

"Good luck, Agent P!" Carl saluted him.

* * *

Perry returned to the backyard to find Phineas and Ferb standing on a ladder, building a huge statue. Isabella, Baljeet, and Buford were watching with interest.

Phineas held a chisel against part of the rock and started banging it with a hammer. "Oh, there you are, Perry." He called down.

Perry gave him a nod. "I'm gonna drop off a couple things. Then I have to go meet Poppy about something that's going on with Palmer."

"Okay. See you when you get back." Phineas said.

"What was that?" Baljeet asked. "You just talked to your platypus."

"Do you speak platypus or somethin'?" Buford asked.

"Nah, I'm just pretending he said stuff." Phineas said. "It's a game Ferb and I started a couple of days ago."

Perry crawled through the pet flap and stuffed the raygun and directions underneath the mattress of his pet bed. Then he slunk out again.

* * *

"Where's the waiter?" Perry asked.

"Maybe they all got fired." Poppy said.

"Or they're sitting in the back room, mocking us, as they eat their endless supply of pizza, having no intention of serving some to us."

"And then they all got fired for slacking off."  
"Yeah. So, what did you need to see me about?"

Poppy played with the straw in her waterglass. "Can we wait until we order… before I tell you?"

"My hearing may be more intact if you tell me within this decade."

"It's not that busy in here." Poppy said. "They should be serving us pretty soon…"  
"It's worth the wait. This place has the world's best pizza." Perry said. He took a sip of water.

"Well, food always DOES taste great when you're starving."

"Oh dear. You figured out their secret to making the world's best pizza. Make a normal pizza, and then starve your customers before giving it to them."

A waiter came over. "May I take your order?"

"Go mow my lawn." Perry said. "That's an order."

Poppy pointed at a picture of a cheese pizza on the menu.

"Cheese for both of you?" The waiter asked. He wrote it down. "I'll be back."

He left.

"All right, you may as well tell me now." Perry said. "Did Palmer explode the oven again?"

Poppy took a deep breath. "Palmer's… in a little bit of trouble with the law."

"Only a matter of time. Did he break something? Or draw on someone's wall?"

Poppy shook her head. "No… well… sort of. He broke into a police van and drove it into a wall."

Perry sucked in his breath. "Is he okay?"  
"He's fine. The car isn't." Poppy said.

"Why? Why would he do that?"  
"I don't know. Anyway, we have to pay for the damages… and I promise you, I'll earn enough in time to pay you back…"

"You need money." Perry said. "Look, you don't have to go making everything all dramatic. Just tell me you need me to lend you some."

"It's the first time he's ever done anything like this…"

"Well, yes and no."

"You're not going to be happy with the price tag."  
"Try me."

Poppy reached into her fur pocket and pulled out a bill. She handed it to Perry.

"Wow. That's allowed to be a number?" Perry said. "Let's dare someone to count to that. No worries. I can pay it."

"You actually have that much money?"

"Well… no. But I can borrow some."

"That kind of makes the whole thing redundant, borrowing money so that I can borrow your money."

"You don't like borrowing borrowed money?" Perry asked innocently.

"I can pay two-hundred of that."

"Okay, so you're lending me two-hundred… that makes a tiny dent. Then I'm probably going to get a little extra today from that raygun job they assigned me to… I get my bonus next Thursday… yeah, that will do it. I just won't have anything left until they pay me again. Problem solved. When Pal's old enough to have allowance, he's paying."

The waiter brought them their pizza and left again. Perry peeled away a slice and took a bite. "Yum. Best pizza in the world. You eat pizza with a knife and fork? What are you, the queen of manners?"

Poppy glared at him. "Just the first slice. It cools it down."  
"It is alarmed by your delicate manner with which you choose to eat it, and it goes cold."

"Fine." Poppy picked the slice up and bit into it.

Perry finished his and took another. "You know, the guy who invented pizza is probably rolling in cash right about now. We could ask HIM to lend us some money. 'Hey, pizza guy, we are your best customers. Now lend us some cash.' Hey, you're taking all the big slices. Pig."

"Who ate half of the pizza, hog?"

"Have you ever wondered why baby pigs are called piglets and not hoglets?"

"Because baby pigs leave enough pizza for their…" Poppy looked at him.

"Friends?"

"…Yeah." Poppy huffed. "Friends."

"Oooo-kay." Perry shrugged. "You looked at me like you wanted me to finish the sentence there."

"I did."

"And I did. So… we're good."

Poppy didn't meet his gaze. "I don't get it. Why can't you at least call me your girlfriend every once in a while?"

Perry nearly spit out his pizza. "Wha…?"

"I mean, we get along great, we had two platypups…"

"Puggles."

"It's platypups. But you insist that I'm just another friend to you!"

"You are, Pops."

Poppy gave him a hurt look. "I… want to be more. I think of you as…"  
"I'm sorry. I'm not interested, that's all." Perry said. "We don't know each other very well. All I know about you is that you have my sense of humor and lack driving skills. And that you tend to get angry when I teach Palmer songs before he goes to sleep."

"Can't you at least try to get to know me?"

"I don't want to grow attached to anyone." Perry said, looking down at his plate. "I promised myself I wouldn't get attached anymore. Not after I grew too close to a friend of mine and he was…"

Perry didn't finish his sentence.

Poppy looked sad. "I'm sorry."

Perry's phone buzzed. He pulled it out and answered it. "Who are you and what do you want?"

"That's exactly what we're asking this random animal that just showed up!" Phineas said. "Ferb says it's saying 'Where is it? Where are you hiding it?' but I don't know if that's really what it's saying. It's hard to trust a translator that's been rigged up in five seconds."

"Wait, what does he want?"

"I'm telling you, I don't KNOW! But Ferb says he's threatening to beat us up if we don't give it to him."

Perry got a sick feeling in his stomach. "Phineas… the animal… is it a bunny?"

"Um… yeah. A white one with big blue eyes."

"Tell him I'm coming over and that if he hurts you, I'm going to punch him so hard that his head will sink into his body." Perry hung up. "Pops, I gotta go… I'm sorry."

"Dennis?" Poppy said. "Do you need help?"

"Nah, I'm fine." Perry scribbled on a check and thrust it into Poppy's hand. "That's for Palmer. Eat the rest of the pizza." He ran out the door.

* * *

Phineas and Ferb were sitting on the couch when Perry got home. Dennis was sitting patiently next to them.

"How did you get him to…" Perry asked.

"When he heard you were coming, he just sat down on the sofa and waited." Phineas said.

Dennis hopped down. "All right. Let's get this over with. Where is it?"

"You need to be more specific with your requests, Dennis." Perry snapped. "What IS it?"

"You know what I want." Dennis said. "I can't properly destroy the rogue hideout if I don't have it. Because what if I destroy the hideout before I have it? Then I will have lost all record of how to make it."  
"What do you WANT?"

"You really don't know?" Dennis asked. "You aren't AWARE? Don't you remember a little while back, when I zapped your sister with it?"

Perry suddenly realized what Dennis wanted. He wanted the raygun Carl had given him. It was the raygun that caused animals to become ten times as strong and as fast as they had been before.

"Why should I give it to you?"

Dennis shrugged. "I need it. My adopted daughter Denise is strong, but she's not half as strong as I would like her to be. I lost it back in Danville forest in a fight with some ferret. My friend Fir told me you had it."

"Well, maybe Fir is malfunctioning. Because I don't have it."

"But you do." Dennis kicked over Perry's pet bed, causing the raygun to fall onto the floor. He picked it up. "A miracle. Fir told me exactly where it was. I just wanted to see how cooperative you would be. But since you don't seem to have any desire to help me…"

"Don't you dare hurt him!" Phineas shouted.

Dennis gave him an unimpressed look. "My my my, aren't we brave?"

"Phineas, stay out of this." Perry said.

Dennis turned and blasted out through the pet flap with amazing speed.

Perry started after him.

"Can we help?" Phineas asked.

Perry looked back at him. Those two boys had helped him in the last rogue fight. And in the battle for the tri-state area.

But they had no equipment now. And it was so last minute, against Dennis. Perry never wanted the boys to get hurt.

"No. Stay here. I'll be back." Perry squeezed through the pet flap and ran after Dennis.


	5. Chapter 5

"Pinky said they needed backup around here." Darren said, shoving apart some leaves.

A tall building was visible. It was made completely from wood, and seemed ready to fall apart.

Perry had lost Dennis when Darren had called him to help find Pinky. It had been at least an hour since Perry had seen the rabbit. He hoped Dennis hadn't used that extra time to do anything TOO horrible.

"I don't see him." Perry said. "Op, wait, there he is. Fighting with that llama."

Perry leapt through the bushes and jumped on the llama from behind. Darren came from the side.

The llama shook them off and fled.

"Thanks, guys." Pinky said, breathing heavily. "Those rogues are tough. I came up here and Dennis jumped me. I thought I was done for, but then some agents answered my distress call… and your owners, man, they totally helped."

"Mine?" Darren asked. "Guess it was only a matter of time before they discovered I was an agent. I might miss Dinah, but I'm not going to miss Elle…"  
"No, Perry's." Pinky looked down at his arm. "Dang, I'm bleeding. Well, that was the last of them. I have no idea where Dennis ran off to."

"My owners? Here?" Perry asked.

"They were after Dennis. Tried to get a raygun back from him. Phineas really fought hard, I was impressed. Ferb should be back any minute now, he was moving Phineas to a safer place. But all the rogues are gone now, so he shouldn't have to worry."

"Moving Phineas?" Perry asked.

Pinky didn't meet his gaze. "He got a little… hurt in the fight with Dennis. Ferb's okay, though."

Perry tried to remain calm. "And where ARE they now?"  
"I don't know. Ferb just said he was moving him away from the fight. I don't know where to. I'd say we need to find Dennis first."  
"Want me to help you with your arm?" Darren asked.

Pinky shrugged. "Yeah, why not."

Perry looked toward the wooden building. If Phineas was hurt, and Ferb intended to return to the fight after moving him, Ferb wouldn't move him very far. Those two were inseparable.

Perry ran to the wooden building and thrust open the door.

He had to climb several flights of stairs before he finally found Phineas. Phineas was lying in a dark corner, shivering.

Perry placed a hand on his back. "Phinny? Are you all right?"  
Phineas sat up and looked at him. "P…Perry?"

"I told you not to get involved."  
"I… just wanted to help!"

"I told you not to."

Phineas sighed. "I'm sorry. I was doing really well… until… how is he so strong?"

"That raygun he stole caused him to be that way. How did he hurt you?"  
"He hit me a bunch of times… in the face, and then in my stomach, and then in my knee…"

"Can you walk?"  
"No…"  
Perry sat down next to Phineas and rubbed his back. "It's fine. You just rest for a while. I'll get you help."

"Don't go. I'm…" Phineas swallowed. "I'm scared."

"Where's Ferb?"

"He left a little while ago."

"I'll stay. Let me know when you think you can get up."

They sat in silence for a while.

"You feeling any better?"

"Sort of…"

They stopped talking when they heard soft footsteps coming downstairs.

"Ferb?" Phineas asked.

Dennis emerged from the staircase, holding a candle. He seemed surprised to see them. "What are you doing here?"

"You hurt him."

"He started it." Dennis said. "And if you value your lives, you'll get out of here."

"Dennis, do one favor for me. One single favor. He needs to rest. Leave us alone."

"This is the rogue hideout." Dennis said. He glanced at Phineas. "I doubt he'll be able to walk downstairs in his condition. Can you lift him?"

"What kind of a question is that?"

"A perfectly legitimate one. Well, he could stay up here. That is an option." Dennis opened a door to an emergency exit in the wall. "And now, you can choose to either save one life, or no lives at all." He released the candle, letting it fall onto the floor.

Flames burst up instantly, licking along the walls.

Perry jumped up. He looked toward Phineas.

"I can't…" Phineas groaned. He managed to push himself into a shaky standing position.

Perry grabbed his hand and ran. They dashed down two flights of stairs before Phineas collapsed.

Perry stopped and tried to pull him up.

"Perry, you can make it. Go." Phineas coughed.

"Don't give up." Perry tugged on Phineas' arms. "Come on. Try."  
"We won't… both make it. If you wait for me…"

The fire was quickly creeping down the stairs.

"I'm not leaving you."

"You have to."  
"Phineas, if you go down, I'm going down with you."  
Phineas coughed again and closed his eyes.

Perry rolled him over and put a hand on his chest. Good. His heart was still beating.

It was probably the smoke that had caused him to pass out.

Perry grabbed his fedora and pulled a bottle of water out of his fur pocket. He poured the water over the fedora until it was thoroughly soaked, wrung it out, and placed it over Phineas' mouth and nose.

He held the fedora there while he grabbed Phineas around his middle, hoisting him up so that his feet and arms dragged on the ground.

Then he made a run for it.

It was difficult with the extra weight, but he managed to do it. The flames chased him from behind, and falling boards from the ceiling threatened to crush him as he ran by.

The smoke started making him dizzy. It was getting harder to breathe. Maybe Dennis and Phineas were right. Maybe he wouldn't be able to save two lives at once.

When he got to the last flight of stairs, it caved in. Perry twisted his body so that Phineas wouldn't get any of the impact.

However, it also caused him to land on his back, with all of Phineas' weight on top of him. Perry struggled to get his wind back.

He hoisted himself back up and shoved through the front door, just as the entire hideout collapsed in flame.

Perry fell limp in the dirt, panting with exhaustion. Now that he was out of danger, Phineas seemed to be a lot heavier.

Perry forced himself to get up. He picked Phineas up again and dragged him into Danville Forest, towards home.

He stopped when he got to something that looked kind of like a house. It was a sort of mound.

He knocked on the door. A ferret-looking animal opened it. "What?" She looked down at Phineas. "Is that your hat?"

"My fedora? Yeah."

"Well, then, we must be from the same agency. I am Agent F. Fellow agent, what brings you here?"  
"He's hurt."

"I'm not really a doctor."  
A baby ferret peeked its head out from behind Agent F. "Ooooh. His eye is purple. How did he do that?"  
Agent F pushed the baby ferret away.

"Is there a hospital nearby that you know of… or a doctor?" Perry asked.

Agent F thought a moment. "There's a hospital off in the quad-state area."

"That's too far."

"Mommy," Said the baby ferret, poking its head out again. "Isn't there a man who lives near here who helped me when I was sick?"

"That's not a human doctor." Agent F said.

Perry removed the damp fedora from Phineas and put it back on his head. "Thank you anyway… I think I know someone who can help." He started dragging Phineas again.

He would be busted for revealing his identity to his owners. He'd probably be relocated, or fired, or both. But he had to get Phineas help soon.

He would rather be relocated than have Phineas die.

Agent F came up behind him. "You need a little help with your load?"

Perry nodded.

"Lead the way, then." Agent F lifted Phineas' legs off of the ground.

They carried him to a big white house. A rocking horse was in the front yard.

Perry sat Phineas down on the porch. "Thank you… for your help."

"Not a problem." Agent F tipped her hat. "Need anything else, call on Ferret."

She turned and headed back to Danville Forest.

Perry took a deep breath and rang the house's doorbell.

After a few moments, the door opened. "Oh, hello. What's the matter?"

Perry pointed at Phineas and started to cry.

"Calm down, Agent P." Monogram patted him on the head. "Calm down. What happened?"

Perry buried his head in Monogram's pant leg and bawled.

"Don't worry." Monogram carefully scooped Phineas up. "Come on in."

* * *

Perry tried to make a pattern out of the cracks in Monogram's ceiling as he lay on the couch.

He felt fine. But Monogram had insisted he stay lying down to keep the trauma from getting to his body.

Perry wasn't sure how a traumatic experience could affect his health. Better safe than sorry, though.

"He's conscious." Monogram said, coming out of the guestroom.

Perry sat up.

"He'll be fine. He's only got a few bruises and a broken knee. But he's doing pretty well and should recover quickly."

Perry felt relieved.

"If you like, you can take off your fedora and go see him."

Perry smiled. So Monogram didn't know. He probably assumed Perry had just found Phineas unconscious.

Perry hid his fedora and jumped off the couch, padding into the guestroom on all four feet. Monogram closed the door behind him.

Perry climbed up onto the guest bed.

Phineas was awake, but he looked tired. Perry sat down next to him. "Monogram says you're going to recover quickly."  
"That's good…" Phineas said.

"I'm sorry about your knee, though. You won't really be able to romp around for a while."

"I'm sorry." Phineas said. "If I'd just listened to you, you wouldn't have had to go through so much for me…"  
"You had good intentions." Perry smiled at him. "And if it makes you feel any better, Pinky said you fought really well."

Phineas nodded. "I'm sorry."

"Hey, it's fine."

"Where's Ferb?"

Perry sighed. "I wish I knew. You're sure he left the hideout after he put you there?"

"Uh huh."

Perry pulled out his videophone and dialed Ferb's number. He waited as it rang.

"Hello, you've reached Ferb's cell." Phineas' voice said. "Leave a message!"

"Hey. Phineas is okay, I got him some help… where are you? We're really worried… call back if you get this." He hung up.

Phineas gave him a worried look. "I hope he remembered to take his phone with him."

"Same here."


	6. Chapter 6

It was pouring rain outside of Monogram's house.

"Still no sign of him, Perry. I'm sorry." Monogram hung up the phone. "I have all our agents on alert. Our surveyor agents are checking the areas you saw him last, and the rest are keeping an eye out."  
Perry nodded.

"It'll be fine." Monogram said, putting his arm around Perry.

Perry flinched. Monogram didn't touch him very often, unless he needed to help him up somewhere.

"I know how you feel." Monogram said. "It's hard. But it will be easier on you if you don't worry so much. I promise you we will find him."

Perry turned away from him. Monogram did NOT know how he felt. Perry wasn't worried, he was scared out of his mind. Ferb was all alone somewhere, and Perry had no idea where that was, or if Ferb was okay.

It made him feel so helpless.

"Why don't I make you some popcorn?" Monogram asked. He stood up and went over to the kitchen cupboards.

"Sure. Ferb's lost, and you make popcorn." Perry muttered.

"It does sound good, doesn't it?" Monogram always invented his own translations for animal noises. He stuck a bag of popcorn in the microwave and pressed start.

Popping noises came from the bag almost instantly.

Phineas emerged from the guest room. He was balancing himself on one leg.

"Can you turn the noise down? I have a headache." He said.

"Popcorn's a noisy food." Monogram said. "Would you like some?"

Phineas shook his head. "Did you find my brother?"

"Not yet." Monogram turned to Perry and signaled him.

Perry got down into pet form. If that was all he had to do to keep his boys with him, he'd do it gladly.

He hoped he'd have both of his boys soon.

"I've never been away from him before." Phineas said. "Except once, when we had this fight. Other than that, we've been together practically our whole lives." Phineas stared at Monogram. "Say, aren't you Perry's vet?"

"Nice touch." Perry chattered.

"Well, yes. It's lucky I found you, isn't it?"

"Very lucky." Phineas limped over to the couch and sat down next to Perry. "Hey, Perry. How've you been, boy?"

"How's your knee?" Perry asked.

"My knee still hurts." Phineas said.

"That's to be expected." Monogram said, handing Phineas a bowl of popcorn. "You did fracture it, after all. What happened, by the way?"

"It's all kind of fuzzy, but I think I fell down some stairs." Phineas said.

Monogram sucked in his breath. "Ow. Well, it's a good thing we found you."

Perry smiled. It was funny to watch Monogram and Phineas lie to each other.

"Are you going to eat that?" Monogram asked.

Phineas shook his head. "My stomach still feels funny."

"I'll be right back, then. I have some emails I need to send. Will you be okay?"

"I'll be good."  
Monogram smiled. He left the room.

"I could kill Dennis." Perry said. "I could seriously strangle him right now."  
"That's how I felt when he threatened you." Phineas said. "That's why I went after him."  
"And he went and hurt you. I could kill him."

Phineas looked at him. "Do you have to go through this drama every day?"

"Not every day."

"But you fight every day."  
"Except on rare occasions, yes. But that's not really drama for me."

Phineas didn't say anything. He swirled the popcorn around the bowl with his hand.

"What's bothering you?"

"I don't want you to fight. You could get hurt."  
"I manage fine."

"Who knows? If I hadn't gone after Dennis, you could have been the one with the black eye and the broken knee."

"Better me than you. I can take care of myself, Phinny. Don't worry."

Phineas kind of smiled.

Perry looked at his phone and pressed a button.

"No messages." Said the phone.

"Does he know your number?" Phineas asked.

"He put me in his contacts." Perry sighed. "I hate to think of him all alone out there."

"Ferb's pretty resourceful." Phineas said. "Maybe he's building a tent or something. And finding berries."

"If he's even in Danville Forest. If only he had a microchip. Then we could find him."

"You can't find out where someone is by a microchip. You can only find out where they live or who they are."

"Mine has a tracking device built into it."

"Really? Man, all those times when Ferb and I wondered where you were, when we could have just tracked you!"

Perry smiled. "Most of the time, I was only a couple of miles away."  
A little girl came downstairs, holding a clown toy. "Who are you?"

"I'm Phineas."

"Oh." The girl squeezed the clown's belly.

"I care so much about you!" Said Carlos.

Perry growled.

"My daddy and my brother work with animals." The girl said. "My daddy bought me this. I left my old one in a big room by mistake."

"The broadcasting room in the agency." Perry grumbled. "It makes announcements every so often."

"Come on, Carlos the caring clown! Let's go play in my room!" The girl squeezed him again as she ran up the stairs.

"Caring and sharing are as fun as a sunny day!" Said Carlos.

"Must… resist… urge… to… destroy…" Perry clawed at the couch instead.

"I guess it is slightly annoying." Phineas said.

Perry curled up next to Phineas and listened to the rain. Usually rain calmed him, but it just reminded him of Ferb.

He hoped Ferb wasn't freezing up in the rain.

"Good news!" Monogram said, reentering the room. "One of the animal agents found Ferb! She's leading him back here as we speak."

Perry breathed a sigh of relief.

"Animal agents?" Phineas asked blankly.

"Um… er… I mean… my trained ferret… weasel thing. Found Ferb. And is leading him here."

"Oh cool!" Phineas said. "Is he okay?"

"Well, I suppose he's well enough to walk. My ferret wouldn't be able to lift him. I don't know of any animal that could lift a human, as a matter of fact."

There was a knock on the door. Monogram opened it, and Ferret ran through.

"Good girl, Fluffy." Monogram said.

"Fluffy? Seriously?" Ferret squeaked. She sat down near the couch and shook the water off of her fur.

Ferb came through a second later, dripping wet, but otherwise unharmed. He was holding a raygun in his hands.

"He got it." Phineas breathed.

"What?" Monogram asked.

"I mean, he got here safely." Phineas said quickly.

"Where did you find that?" Monogram asked Ferb.

Ferb handed it to him. "Somewhere in the woods."

"I got that away from Dennis a few days ago." Ferret told Perry. "Then, he comes to my house begging for me to let him in. He says someone's chasing him. I looked behind him, and there was that kid. They got into a tussle, and the kid got the raygun. Then I chased him off."

"I'll get you a towel." Monogram said. He went into the bathroom.

Ferb shut the door. Phineas limped over to him and hugged him. "I thought I'd never see you again!"

"I was going after Dennis." Ferb whispered. "I thought I told you that."

"You didn't."

"I called." Perry said.

Ferb nodded. "I was chasing Dennis. I couldn't pick up. I didn't want to lose him."

"And now you have the raygun back!" Phineas said.

"Who cares about the raygun? We have Ferb back." Perry padded over to him and cuddled up against his leg.

* * *

Linda had not stopped asking questions since the moment Phineas and Ferb came through the front door. Phineas stuck to his story about falling down a flight of stairs, and that Ferb had gone looking for help all night. Perry's vet had found Phineas and nursed him back to health, and eventually found Ferb as well.

After about an hour, Linda finally left the boys alone. Ferb sat down under the tree in the backyard. Phineas sat next to him in a lawn chair, keeping his leg elevated on a footstool.

Perry dug around in the dirt with his bill. When he couldn't find any worms, he simply rolled over and covered his back in dirt.

A corn dog flew through the air and landed on Ferb's head.

"Stupid neighbors." Phineas muttered. "Yo! Mr. Weaver! Your kids are throwing corn dogs into our yard again!"

* * *

"I can't believe Ferb got the raygun away from Dennis." Darren said.

"I know." Perry said. "He's impressive. And now the ray is out of Dennis' hands. He won't be able to shoot any more rogues with it."

"I can't believe he'd shoot his daughter. Even though it's safe… I mean, just to make her stronger…"

"She's not really his daughter. He 'adopted' her." Perry said.

The loudspeaker in the O.W.C.A came on. Perry and Darren snapped to attention.

"When you tell your friends that you care about them, it shows you care!" Carlos the caring clown announced.

"And you wonder why I hardly ever come into the O.W.C.A anymore." Perry growled.

"At least Monogram didn't get his daughter Ferdinand the friendly fish." Darren said. "Baby Elle got one last week. It's been driving me up a wall."

"Did you call me?" Asked Ferdinand the frog as he hopped past.

"Nope. Sorry." Darren waved him along and turned back to Perry.

Carl and Monogram walked by. "Sir, don't you think we should take that toy out of the announcement room?" Carl asked.

"I think it's good for the animals. They need a few positive messages."

"Oh no we DON'T!" Perry chattered.

"Fun and friendship!" Carlos said.

Perry pulled his grappling gun out of his fur pocket. "Want to come with me, Darren?"

"Come where?"

"To destroy a clown that seriously needs some destroying."


End file.
